Decluttering Sentimental Items

I woke up to the beautiful sound of rain last Thursday morning, and I decided to start working on the VHS-C tape project. My son has been asking me to finish putting these family home movies onto DVD’s. So I worked on it most of that day, and Sunday too. I’ll be continuing this project (when I have the time) until I finish it.

While the movies were recording, I decluttered the school room and went through what I call the “sentimental items”. I organized by categories and made a list of “Sentimental Projects” to be completed at some time in the future. (Winter might be a good time to work on these.)  So basically, I decluttered the sentimental items and made another To Do list! You can see photos below of: my current project’s mess, the pile of photos to scan, my decluttering checklist, and my new Sentimental Projects list. Making progress!

 

Dear Stuff

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I found this letter that I wrote (maybe two years ago), prompted by a blog post on Be More with Less called “How to Write a Break-up Letter to Your Stuff”.  It was written quickly and without revision, but today I am appreciating the analogy.

Dear Stuff,

I am making a commitment to only be with stuff that serves a good purpose or leads me closer to God. I believe that this is how God wants me to relate to things.  I’m liking the idea of seeing material possessions as tools.  They help me to do God’s will. Like school supplies and curriculum help me to educate my children. Pots and pans are tools to cook with.  My crucifix reminds me of Jesus.

I’m writing to tell you that you are not good for me anymore.  I don’t need you; you do not cause me joy.  Some of you I did need in the past.  You were tools at one time, and you served your purpose well.  but my life has changed, and I no longer need your help.  Others of you, I don’t even know why I have you around.  I never used you for anything.  Maybe you were given to me and I said thank you to the giver because I love them and didn’t want to say no.  Maybe I purchased you when I was afraid.  You made me feel better.  From you I am learning to have a criteria for future purchases.  To ask if I really need it.  What purpose will it serve?  Can I do without it?

I am determined to live a well-ordered life.  I am working my butt off this summer to go through everything and keep only the tools God wants me to use and to let go of my attachments to you all.

I have trouble letting go of some of you.  I’d like to keep you just in case I’ll use you again in the future.  But this is not what God teaches.

He wants me to live in the present and serve Him, love Him and pray unceasingly to Him.  He does not want me to worry about tomorrow.  He says it in the Bible.  He will provide for me always.  I really need to trust Him completely and let you go.

I did not sign my letter.  It was anonymous.  And because I like to linger over ideas…  How about a list of questions to ask when decluttering, based on the ideas found in this letter?

  • Does this serve a good purpose or lead me closer to God?
  • Why do I have this?
  • Is this a tool I used in the past, but don’t need anymore?  Let it go.
  • Have I never used this?  Let it go.
  • Was this a gift? Did I thank the giver?  Let it go.
  • Did someone give it to me and I didn’t want to say no?  Let it go.
  • Did I purchase this when I was afraid?  Let it go.

Questions to ask before a new purchase:

  • Do I really need this?
  • What purpose will it serve?
  • Can I do without it?

Remember:  Live in the present.  Love, serve and pray all day.  Do not worry about tomorrow.  God will provide for you always.  Trust him completely and let it go.

DECLUTTERING QUESTIONS    30 DAY LIST

 

 

Weekend Retreats

 

I’ve been away from my home for the past three weekends. First, I attended a women’s silent Ignatian Spiritual Exercises retreat, then on Columbus Day weekend, I spent time with extended family in Bailey Island, ME.  This past Saturday, I was at a Schole Sister’s local retreat called Learning Well, with Cindy Rollins! So on Sunday, I reflected on some of the ideas I’ve taken in, made a practical plan of how I will implement my retreat resolutions, and I chose the books I plan to read in the next few weeks.

I’m toying with the idea of playing the Minimalism Game for the rest of October and for the month of November, as progress on my decluttering checklist has decreased.  I did play the game for five days before my first retreat and I got rid of 114 items from my basement.

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I also printed out a time log I found online, because it’s a super fun way to see how I’m spending my time, and it’s helpful when implementing new habits to see if they are realistic or not.  And speaking of habits… I also printed out a new habit tracker.  I created it for a 21 day period, with boxes to check off or shade for each habit, each of the 21 days.  I type my habits in the left column and fill in days of the week and dates along the top. A blank one is shown below.

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Peace!

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Decluttering the Schoolroom

WARNING:  This is a long story of progress, not perfection.  If you are not interested in pondering the decluttering process, then skip to the photos.

I’ve been homeschooling for fourteen years now. I spent the first half of this time accumulating materials. I was building a home library, an art studio, a classroom, and trying to figure out which methods and curricula worked for my family. Then it was suddenly “all too much.” (Thank you, Peter Walsh!) I’ve decluttered at least once every year since then.  In the beginning, I got rid of a lot. I went through all the emotions you feel when you do a big purge. It was an eye-opening experience.

Past purchases can teach you much about yourself. I could see how I bought things we didn’t need out of fear, or to avoid pain; how I blindly followed “experts” instead of praying and trusting God; how I thought curricula, and not discipline, was the problem; and so on… It was all a learning experience. Processing those feelings helped me to see more clearly and stop the spending. That didn’t mean I reached the schoolroom “click point” as Marie Kondo calls that place where you feel you have just the right amount of stuff. So this time, my goal was to keep only those things that we love, or use, or will use at a specific time in the future.

I divided the room into these categories:

  • Furniture
  • Accessories
  • Walls
  • Books
  • Art Supplies
  • Craft Supplies
  • Office Supplies
  • Mary’s Activities

Next, I picked up each item for consideration and made lists of “The Keepers.” I asked myself (and sometimes my kids) three questions:

  1. Do we love it?
  2. How often do we use it?
  3. Does it serve a good purpose?

A “yes” to any of the questions made it a keeper. Some items went into the trash or donate piles.  Where it got difficult was when we answered “No. Not at all. No, BUT I’m going to use it someday!” Or we might use it in the future, or maybe it’ll serve a good purpose someday.

Then, two months-of-doing-nothing later, after realizing that some of the “Keepers” did not meet my criteria of love, use, or going to use it at a specific time in the future, I made another pass through the room.  I weeded out some more items.

This time I went through quickly, not touching every item individually, and I used another set of questions which I made up based on the Principle and Foundation of the Spiritual Exercises of St. Ignatius.

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  1. Does this help me to praise, reverence, and serve God our Lord?
  2. Do I use this to help me on to my end?
  3. Does this hinder me as to my end?

The thing about homeschooling books and curricula, and even some art supplies, is that unless you know in advance what your course of study will be every year for all of your homeschooling years, it’s impossible to know whether or not you will use a certain book at a specific time in the future.  The best I can do is make an educated guess.  I’ve been procrastinating “finishing” decluttering the schoolroom because I’ve been confusing the end with the means.

I was so focused on having the perfect amount of stuff in the room, that I forgot that the perfect amount of stuff is not my end.  These new questions reminded me of my true end, and made me realize that having a few extra picture books on a shelf that we never read is not going to hinder me as to my true end.

I just need to be the best steward of our things that I can be at this time, then move on.  So I am keeping the items that we love, we use, and a limited number of items that we will likely use in the future, and I’m assigning a home for each item.

Because my schoolroom is large with lots of storage spaces, it is easy to find homes for everything.  The way that I am limiting the number of items is by confining them to certain areas.  And these areas don’t need to be filled.  Empty space is desirable.  Here are some of their homes:

  • Mary’s activities in the old computer cabinet
  • chapter books in the cherry cabinets
  • reference and religious books on the top white shelves
  • readers, poetry books and plays on the middle white shelves
  • picture books on the bottom left shelf
  • history, geography, art and science books on the bottom right shelf
  • cleaning, art and craft supplies in the cabinets and a drawer
  • office supplies in a drawer
  • Playdoh in a cabinet
  • sewing supplies in a chest of drawers

In the schoolroom closet, I have a dresser in which I am keeping:

  • items to use later this year in the top drawer
  • audiobooks in the little drawer above the cabinet
  • future language arts, Latin, math and religion books in the second drawer
  • future art books and syllabi in the bottom drawer
  • future music, science, history and geography books in the cabinet

Many of the books and supplies for the current year are kept on shelves in the closet.

I feel comfortable with the items currently in our schoolroom.  I don’t consider them to be clutter.  There are more activities, sewing, and art and craft supplies in here than I would like; but I keep them because the girls love and/or use them, and they have assigned homes.  I expect that many of these items will go out the door as the girls get older and their interests change.  You can see the rest of the schoolroom when I do a room tour post. That’ll happen when I am finished with this VHS-C tape project,

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or right before school starts…  whichever comes first.

 

 

Summer Work and Play

Two weeks have passed since my last blog past.  What have I been doing with my time?

I’ve been spending lots of it at my father’s house, sitting by the pool, and occasionally doing laps in it. I also visit with my mom and stepfather once a week, and I sometimes harvest my garden. I’ve been attending free concerts at local parks.  This week, I attended a performance by a Neil Diamond cover band.  I’ve seen three children’s theater plays with my three younger girls.   Yesterday, I giggled through the musical You’re a Good Man, Charlie Brown. I did make two new decluttering checklists for two of my major projects, “The Basement” and “Sentimental Items”.

I didn’t make a checklist for “Paper” as I said I would, because Bobby and I blew through it all last Saturday.  A “Paper” post will be coming soon.

I read Making Room for God: Decluttering and the Spiritual Life.

On July 27th, I said this:

If I really focus, (and don’t watch so many movies) maybe I can complete these projects by the end of this summer.

Well, about movies….  since then, I’ve watched Harry Potter and the Deathly Hallows: Part 1, Harry Potter and the Deathly Hallows: Part 2, The Greatest Showman,  Leon: The Professional, Gladiator, Braveheart, John Wick, Yours, Mine and Ours, John Wick 2, and Roxanne.  (Those are the ones I can remember.)

I’ve also prepared for the next homeschool year, and I thought I finished decluttering the schoolroom, but I’m considering doing one more round before I post about it.  The reason is that my original goal was to keep only things that we love, use, or will use at a specific time in the future.  I realized today that I have kept many items that don’t fit that criteria.  So, I either need to change my goal, or do another round.  A “schoolroom” post will be coming soon.

Decluttering Checklist: Update

I’ve lost count on the number of weeks I’ve been working on decluttering my entire home.  Here’s the checklist!

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Those dates to the right of the projects are (or were) the deadlines. So you can see I’ve missed a couple of them.  I did do my portion of the master bedroom, but I didn’t check it off yet because I’m hoping Bobby will go through his things, as well as his clothing.  I spent quite a bit of time rearranging and redecorating the master bedroom.  Maybe I’ll do a room tour soon.

The schoolroom was almost finished. I only had some things to go through in the closet, BUT… I got sidetracked by homeschool planning for next year. I started making all sorts of lists and piles. I’ve been listening to Brave Writer podcasts and lectures on Classical U.  (The latter seriously made helping Bobby weed and spread mulch for six hours enjoyable.)  I’ve been pondering educational philosophies and pedagogies, which is totally normal for this time of year, but not every year. Some years, (usually when I’m overwhelmed), I just follow prepared lesson plans.  But not this year. I guess I’m feeling pretty good.  And I’m having fun with it, even if it is rather geeky.

The basement.  A major project.  One day, it rained like crazy, and I worked on it all day. And after that it was sunny for weeks and I kept taking the kids swimming at my father’s pool. But I made a good dent in the basement.  I started with the largest items first. I used a local Buy Nothing Facebook page to “gift” a plastic see-saw, a sandbox, a TV stand, a framed giclée print, and loads of VHS movies.

I found out that you should let things “simmer” on that group.  You don’t just give something to the first person who can get to your home.  You give it time for many people to say they’re interested in the item and then you choose one.  It’s not as efficient as dumping a load off at the Salvation Army, but it does feel good to make people happy, and if they really are trying not to buy anything, I’d like to help them. It’s an interesting goal that sounds difficult to achieve.

I also got rid of a twin bed and Bunkie board through a Craigslist free stuff post.  And I collected many bags of trash which Matthew took away along with this stuff in the trailer.  It was progress.  Then I went around the basement taking notes of all of the areas/categories that I plan to address one at a time.

This past week, it rained everyday.  But instead of working on the basement, I jumped ahead to sentimental items.  Joseph and Sarah (especially Joseph) were pushing me to figure out how to convert the family home movies, which are on VHS-C tapes to DVD’s.  So I took out all this stuff.

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Some of it was from my Mom, some was from Bobby’s study, and I needed a VCR. Matthew had three in the basement. (Sometimes it’s handy having a collector in the house.)  I later found out that Bobby had another VCR in his study.  He was probably saving it for this project.

THIS IS A MAJOR PROJECT!!  It should have it’s own category on the checklist. In fact,  I think each of the major projects should have their own checklist. So my goals for this weekend will be to finish decluttering the schoolroom, and to make new checklists for the basement, sentimental items, and paper. The garage and digital clutter can wait.  If I really focus, (and don’t watch so many movies) maybe I can complete these projects by the end of this summer.

Decluttering Checklist: The Kitchen

I remember the first time I decluttered my kitchen. It was in 1998, just after I read the book Totally Organized by Bonnie McCullough. I gathered everything in my cabinets and drawers and put the items in cardboard boxes in another room.  It seemed extreme at the time, but it was really just a mini packing party.  I brought items back into the kitchen as needed, and eventually purged what was not needed.  (And I likely kept some items I deemed unnecessary, to please my husband.)

Now we are a family of eight.  We have WAY MORE STUFF than we had back then.  I don’t do kitchen packing parties anymore.  We use the stuff we have. I’ve spent years tweaking the number of spatulas (and other kitchen tools) that will work best for our family. So this latest decluttering wasn’t difficult.

I went through each shelf or drawer, one at a time, and decided which items to keep. I cleaned as I went.  Some areas I put back exactly as they were and other areas I rearranged to fit our current lifestyle.  For example, I made one cabinet just for snacks.  We used to keep candy and a blender in that cabinet, and some snacks that Bobby eats almost daily were stored in the pantry.  This new arrangement is more convenient.

I purged plastic cups that BOBBY! (surprisingly) said we should get rid of.  And I also let go of a large electric mixer and oven mitts that belonged to Sarah.  She was willing to part with them after a couple of years of them sitting unused.  Sarah is the main baker in our family and she said that she prefers the hand mixer.

I felt really great when I finished with the kitchen declutter.  Just as it is in the girls’ room, there is truly a home for each item.  Now we just need to establish good habits of putting things back in their places. My plan is to attach this activity to meal times.  So, after we eat, we put the kitchen back in order.  And I am certain we are going to eat!

Decluttering Checklist: Weeks Eight and Nine

So this is what I checked off since my last post:

  • dining room (another round)
  • linen closet
  • extra closet
  • master bathroom
  • master bedroom (my own things)
  • Sarah’s clothing
  • Rachel’s clothing
  • Matthew’s clothing
  • my clothing
  • basement: clothing storage
  • basement: decorations
  • basement: trash from Matthew’s room
  • mudroom

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So, I went through the dining room again after realizing that I had just glanced around the hutch without actually touching each item and asking myself questions about it.  I took out our excess gravy boats, crystal dishes, platters, and this cheese dome.  I asked Bobby about them, and surprisingly, he thought we could get rid of the cheese dome and one crystal platter.  So these are gone.

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The linen closet and extra closet in our back hall “before” and “after” photos:

The extra closet stores: lightbulbs, batteries, my tools, paper products, the crock pot, a box of items to return, a box of items to donate, and some more household maintenance items. I’ve been through these areas so many times, that we are left with only items we actually use.  I think I got rid of about four blankets and 2 pillowcases. Also, some items we meant to return and never did.

I brought up my out of season clothing and I’m donating (with Sarah’s too) a full kitchen trash bag.  I plan on making my own summer capsule wardrobe soon.  I may buy a few new items, but most of it will come from items already in my spring capsule wardrobe.

This is where I began in the basement.

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I updated the lists I keep inside some of the clothing bins so I know what’s in them.

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I crossed out items as I purged them, and added new items going in.  I also made a few new labels for the bins and went through the Halloween and Easter (and other holiday) decorations. I know we use all of the Christmas and Thanksgiving decorations, with the exception of the Carousel. I asked Bobby about it because it belongs to him. No answer yet.

Finally, these are things that have gone “out the door”, and there are even more items in the back of my van right now.  I’m making progress!

Decluttering Checklist: Week Seven

This week I checked off:

  • the living room
  • the dining room

I purged paper one day. And I entered loads of receipts into an expense notebook that I am trying to keep up with this year instead of using Quicken.

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I also bagged and boxed stuff that we had already decided to get rid of that was still lying around the house. I dropped it off at the Salvation Army and felt a little lighter.

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This was week three of the Uncluttered course. The assignment was to declutter your vehicle (which I did), and the main living areas such as the living room, dining room, sunroom, etc. The only thing I’m getting rid of in the living room is a large landscape painting we had hanging for about twelve years. I don’t really like how it looks with our new furniture. I’m testing out the Order picture (which I love) that was hanging in the foyer. I’m not sure if I’ll keep it in here yet. I’ll give it some time.

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I tested many things above the loveseat, but haven’t found anything satisfactory yet. I’m bummed that Joseph will not allow me to hang his Harvey portrait in the living room. In fact, he won’t even allow me to post a picture of it here.  Joseph played Elwood P. Dowd in his high school’s production of Harvey.  His art teacher created a fake painting of Elwood (with Joseph’s face) and the rabbit, Harvey.  I laughed when Joseph, in character, hung the “painting” above his mantle on stage, and I’d love to see it daily, but no…  so Lego Harry Potter 7 is up there temporarily to make me chuckle for a couple of weeks.

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That throw pillow has moved up to Rachel’s bed.  And speaking of moving things around…

Yesterday, I listened to Joshua Becker’s Uncluttered webinar. In it, he talked to the people who were organizing and moving things from room to room, but not really getting rid of much. That’s me!  I know I’ve been decluttering for years, so I’m not going to have as much to purge as someone just starting out, but truthfully, in certain areas in my home, that is what I am doing.  For example, in the school room, it is easier to reorganize all of the extra curriculum, art and craft supplies, etc. then to let them go and trust that we’ll be OK without them. I’m talking about all of those items in my home that I’m not using and I’m keeping just in case. “I might need them someday.”

Joshua said organizing is always temporary. You organize one day, only to organize again another day. Minimizing, getting rid of stuff, is always permanent.  He added some more motivators. Organizing doesn’t help anyone else. (i.e. donate)  And organizing doesn’t force self-reflection. This is so true.  I have reflected a lot over the years on the stuff I have gotten rid of, and this doesn’t happen when you move it around avoiding dealing with the hard questions and truths about yourself.

Here are some more notes I took during the webinar that will help me as I get back to work on my checklist today:

  1. Do I really need this?
  2. Do I really use it?
  3. Why do I have this?
  4. Minimize first, before organizing and thinking about storage.

And lastly, I’ve added some deadlines to my checklist.  I think they are realistic, but I’m hoping I’ll finish most of them before their deadline dates.  I’ll post my progress soon.

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Decluttering Checklist: Week Six

This week I continued to work on the girls’ room. I hung the new rods and curtain panels and we put Rachel and Hannah’s belongings in the new dresser, wardrobe and bins.  Do the sheers look better loosely hanging or pushed more to the sides?

I also spent time planting a vegetable garden and flowers in the backyard.

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It was the second week of the Uncluttered course. This week’s assignment was to walk around the rooms of my home observing the stuff in them. Then, to go around again with a trash bag, filling it up with things I know I can get rid of right away.

The tour around my home was, for the most part, a happy one.  I took written notes about each room such as:

  • I’m going to go through everything in here
  • I’m done here except for some decorating and organizing
  • Done, but need to follow our routines better

When I got to the schoolroom, I felt a little worried. There was the usual stuff that I can totally handle, but there were also scrapbooks, photos, the VHS-C project, and other sentimental items that I’m not ready to deal with. I continued the tour downstairs, feeling more positive.

  • Need to make seasonal changes and declutter in here
  • There isn’t much clutter showing in here, but I’ll need to go through cabinets and drawers
  • Looks good in here

Then I got to the basement and wrote, “Aagh!!!!!!”

I listed items to get rid of and categories to go through.  Then I wrote, “Many hours!  Days!  Weeks!”  And then after that I had to tell Bobby for the fifteenth time that I am working on the main areas of the house first, and when I’m finished, then I’ll make Matthew work on the basement with me. And I’m going to get rid of a lot of stuff! (I was really trying to convince myself that it will happen.)

The hardest thing for me seems to be finding time when I am home to work on this. I’ve been out a lot and we had a Confirmation party last Sunday and we’re having a 7th birthday party for Mary this Saturday, so I’m also spending time on cleaning, party prep and socializing.  No more excuses… I am going to commit to at least 15 minutes each day this week.  I want to make progress.  I CAN DO THIS!!